Most pregnant couples and parents to new babies do their research, and all are bound to be online searching for hours for all they need to know about becoming a new parent!
There are so many websites to choose from when trying to find the information to the questions that we all have when facing this transition in our lives of adding a new family member. It is so nice when you hear of a local website where you can get some much needed information all in one place, and an extra plus when it is easy to navigate!
We wanted to share with all our blog-readers this amazing website that we use, Philly Parent Circle. These folks really seem to understand how important it is to search and find exactly what you are looking for and quickly! Who has time to sit and search and search and search when you have a crying baby in your arms?!
Here is a message from Philly Parent Circle to our Stork Support friends (and don’t miss the FREE membership offer at the bottom of the message!):
We invite you to join www.phillyparentcircle.com, Philadelphia's newest and most comprehensive resource guide and community for parents, parents-to-be and caregivers. Browse the over 1000 listings, complete with ratings and reviews, across preschools, camps, activities, classes, new baby resources, birthday parties and/ or search for exactly what you are looking for by activity type, location, age, and cost. Make sure you visit the discussion forums to find nannies, play-groups, advice, support and general good fun! Plus don't miss our monthly free ticket giveaways to the best events and attractions in Philly. Join www.phillyparentcircle.com for free with code PPCSTORK. Sign up soon as this code expires 6/5/11.
Take a minute and check it out! It really is a website to bookmark as one of your favorites!
Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest~
Liz & Rebecca
May 30, 2011
May 26, 2011
RECOMMENDED READING ALERT!
BOOK REVIEW
Of
Behind the Smile: My Journey Out of
Of
Behind the Smile: My Journey Out of
Postpartum Depression
by Marie Osmond
by Marie Osmond
Marie’s powerful words remind us of the importance of asking for help when it is needed. Marie struggled for weeks in silence rather than sharing with anyone how she was feeling – exactly what we would not want a woman to do. Although experts cannot determine exactly what causes Postpartum Depression, we do know it is treatable so no one needs to suffer in silence. Classic symptoms of Postpartum Depression include feeling excessively overwhelmed, excessive tearfulness or anxiety, inability to sleep, irritability, lack of appetite, lack of interest in the baby, and disturbing thoughts. If you or someone you know may be showing signs of a perinatal mood disorder such as Postpartum Depression, be sure to speak with a professional to get additional support. Utilizing a home-based service like Stork Support can be an excellent option. Whichever provider you choose, however, be sure that the assessment, counseling and support are provided by an experienced professional with whom you feel comfortable.
Marie’s bravery in sharing her experience reminds us that no one is perfect and no one expects mothers to have all the answers. Ask for help, the answer you receive and the support you feel may surprise you.
Sincerely,
From The Stork’s Nest ~
Liz & Rebecca
May 23, 2011
PARENTING IS NO CUP OF COFFEE
It is spring (albeit rainy and dreary here in the Northeast) but that means it is yard sale season. If any of you are like me, I LOVE “yarding” and finding those great buys on kids toys and clothes. On Friday evening I informed my husband that I was going to go “yarding” in the morning, and he was on his own for breakfast with the kids. I get up daily around 6:00 a. m. with my youngest, and do the tasks of getting everyone dressed, fed, and their teeth and hair brushed. It was a treat to leave the kids in my husband’s very capable hands, go to Wawa and get myself a coffee to enjoy while driving around looking for great yard sales.
I got out and spent about two hours shopping and around 10:00, I called my sister who had just rolled out of bed and asked if she wanted to join me, which she did.
We were happily shopping and came upon a friend’s house that was having her own yard sale. She commented that is was so nice that we (my sister and I) go “yarding” together! I promptly told her that it is a rare occurrence, as my sister is the mom to two teenagers and has no need, nor desire, to get up on a Saturday morning at the crack of dawn to root through other people’s stuff. I, on the other hand, was more than thrilled to be out with my Wawa coffee, without children!
It got me thinking about how easy my sister had it now. I know she had been in the stage I am now when her children were younger, but I was still a bit envious that she can sleep in, go to Wawa whenever she wants to get her own coffee, not worry about being home in time for that all important nap, and everything else parents to young children face.
I brought up my thoughts to my dear sister, who pretty much laughed at me. She explained that the stage of parenting that I am in is easier than hers. I have all my children with me pretty much all the time, and I am shaping and molding my children to be what I think is their best. She needs to be secure in how she completed this task and hope her children make decisions that will not negatively impact their future. She needs to handle the teenage temper tantrums, “and they involve WORDS”, unlike toddler temper tantrums that are pretty much screaming and flailing.
I thought again about my sister, and my envy that she doesn’t have to get up early, dress, brush teeth and hair for her teenagers. What she DOES have to do is worry about whose car they are in, stay up and wait for them to come home on a Friday night, keep them on track with schoolwork, and support them when they have arguments with their best friends.
Seems that this parenting thing doesn’t get any easier, it just gets to be a different kind of difficult. Mothers of young children have a physically demanding job, and mothers of teenagers have an emotionally demanding job; everything in between and after can be a combination of both! I am pretty sure that the worry parents have about their children never ceases, no matter what the stage. I know, from comments that are made, that my parents STILL worry about me, a married woman and mother of three!
What I have come to know is our own experiences on parenting based on the age or stage of our children is real and true. Talking with others can put our own thoughts and feelings into perspective, and the comfort in knowing that experiences and degrees of difficulties do change, but are manageable.
It is so very important it is to have the support of family and friends throughout each stage of parenting. No matter the age of your children, talk with other parents, your own parents, or a professional to get the support that all of us parents need.
Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest ~
Rebecca
May 20, 2011
STEP BY STEP
No one told me just how much pain I’d be in after my first c-section. The worse part was figuring out how to climb the steps in my house. And I’m just talking about a regular flight of steps here, people. No spiral staircases or grand entryway a la Daddy Warbucks’ house – just your standard run of the mill 13 steps that were haunting me as I stood at the bottom. My incision burned and even though on the ground floor I was Commander in Chief taking care of the baby, changing diapers, and issuing chores to family members helping out, that flight of steps managed to stop me in my tracks.
So, what did I do? I did what I thought any self-respecting, new mother would do! I ignored them. Yep, I set up camp on the first floor. Moved the ole toothbrush to the downstairs powder room, had my husband bring down the bassinet, made the living room recliner my bed. I told everyone it was “just easier this way.” And there I stayed for about three weeks.
It wasn’t until my second c-section that one of the hospital nurses casually mentioned during my discharge, “and you know to take the steps sideways facing the wall while holding on to the railing, right?” I played it cool. Oh, yes, the “side-stepping railing trick!” Of course I knew that one! Phew, she bought it.
When we got home with Baby #2 and I stood at the bottom of the staircase looking up, I felt better having a plan. And, this is probably no shock to you, I made it up just fine taking my time and moving step by step while facing the wall just as the nurse suggested.
But, have no fear! The lessons from this situation were not lost upon me. First – the power of asking for help is huge. If I had only mentioned that I was struggling with those steps, I probably would have gotten the side-stepping suggestion two years earlier when I so desperately needed it. And second – as I moved up that staircase for the first time sideways, I realized the beauty in moving slowly and taking my time. I spent the first few days home with my first child in a complete frenzy, rushing to meet the baby’s needs before he even cried and issuing orders to everyone helping in an effort to keep control of my household. Right then and there while sideways on those steps I promised to take my time and live in the moment. To take a deep breath when I felt out of control. Not to put so much pressure on myself to know everything. Geez, who knew a flight of stairs could teach so much?
So remember, Mommies, take your time and ask for help. There’s no shame in it. And you never know, what you learn could be a step in the right direction (yes, pun is intended).
Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest~
Liz
So, what did I do? I did what I thought any self-respecting, new mother would do! I ignored them. Yep, I set up camp on the first floor. Moved the ole toothbrush to the downstairs powder room, had my husband bring down the bassinet, made the living room recliner my bed. I told everyone it was “just easier this way.” And there I stayed for about three weeks.
It wasn’t until my second c-section that one of the hospital nurses casually mentioned during my discharge, “and you know to take the steps sideways facing the wall while holding on to the railing, right?” I played it cool. Oh, yes, the “side-stepping railing trick!” Of course I knew that one! Phew, she bought it.
When we got home with Baby #2 and I stood at the bottom of the staircase looking up, I felt better having a plan. And, this is probably no shock to you, I made it up just fine taking my time and moving step by step while facing the wall just as the nurse suggested.
But, have no fear! The lessons from this situation were not lost upon me. First – the power of asking for help is huge. If I had only mentioned that I was struggling with those steps, I probably would have gotten the side-stepping suggestion two years earlier when I so desperately needed it. And second – as I moved up that staircase for the first time sideways, I realized the beauty in moving slowly and taking my time. I spent the first few days home with my first child in a complete frenzy, rushing to meet the baby’s needs before he even cried and issuing orders to everyone helping in an effort to keep control of my household. Right then and there while sideways on those steps I promised to take my time and live in the moment. To take a deep breath when I felt out of control. Not to put so much pressure on myself to know everything. Geez, who knew a flight of stairs could teach so much?
So remember, Mommies, take your time and ask for help. There’s no shame in it. And you never know, what you learn could be a step in the right direction (yes, pun is intended).
Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest~
Liz
May 18, 2011
IT'S A MATERIAL WORLD
We have all been there as kids. You were at a birthday party, baseball game or some social function when your Dad or Mom showed up. As they were walking toward you and your friends you became mortified at the clothes they were wearing. Maybe it was Mom showing up in her non-designer blue jeans and multi-colored shirt that could have been someone else's curtains. Or your Dad sporting short shorts for men, white tube socks pulled up and the white logo-free sneakers (or worse yet Velcro white sneakers). You try your hardest to not hear them calling you in fear that your friends might have seen them!
Let’s face it, everyone thought their parents’ fashion sense was horrific and could be embarrassing at times. It wasn’t just fashion either; it could have been the used Cutlass sitting in the driveway with rust around the rims, buying Hydrox instead of Oreos, or trying to convince us that video games would wear out the color in the television so that’s why we shouldn’t buy one (my dad used that one on me).
So as I began preparing to start a family of my own the one thing I promised myself was that I would not repeat the errors of my own parents. Whatever it took, I would not wear anything but Nike sneaks, ‘Tommy’ shorts or shirts, and I would always still have the best that I could afford. Then reality hit….
My first son arrived, then my second son and now my daughter. Whether you have three children or just one the time comes when you have to start making choices. I could buy my new lawnmower or use that to pay for the summer pool membership. I could buy the Underarmor golf shirt or go to Target and buy one for half the price and use those savings to buy my kid new pants and shoes. The examples are endless and you will get to the point some day when you realize why your parents looked like they did and lived the way they did; it’s called love! We love our kids so much that we will give up anything to make their life better and give them more than we had.
So when I look back and still see my dad in his not so cool Kmart sneakers or Members Only jacket from 1980, I am filled with pride because I know that I was loved. I hope that one day my kids say "Thanks Mom and Dad for not being so “cool.”
Sincerely,
From the Guests' Stork Nest~
Daddy-O
Let’s face it, everyone thought their parents’ fashion sense was horrific and could be embarrassing at times. It wasn’t just fashion either; it could have been the used Cutlass sitting in the driveway with rust around the rims, buying Hydrox instead of Oreos, or trying to convince us that video games would wear out the color in the television so that’s why we shouldn’t buy one (my dad used that one on me).
So as I began preparing to start a family of my own the one thing I promised myself was that I would not repeat the errors of my own parents. Whatever it took, I would not wear anything but Nike sneaks, ‘Tommy’ shorts or shirts, and I would always still have the best that I could afford. Then reality hit….
My first son arrived, then my second son and now my daughter. Whether you have three children or just one the time comes when you have to start making choices. I could buy my new lawnmower or use that to pay for the summer pool membership. I could buy the Underarmor golf shirt or go to Target and buy one for half the price and use those savings to buy my kid new pants and shoes. The examples are endless and you will get to the point some day when you realize why your parents looked like they did and lived the way they did; it’s called love! We love our kids so much that we will give up anything to make their life better and give them more than we had.
So when I look back and still see my dad in his not so cool Kmart sneakers or Members Only jacket from 1980, I am filled with pride because I know that I was loved. I hope that one day my kids say "Thanks Mom and Dad for not being so “cool.”
Sincerely,
From the Guests' Stork Nest~
Daddy-O
May 16, 2011
DIFFERENTLY TOGETHER
When my husband and I were dating, and learning about each other, it was clear that we wanted the same thing in our future, a family including children. As a young married couple, we were busy with our careers, taking vacations, eating dinner whenever and wherever we wanted, taking our dog for walks, going shopping, sleeping late on weekends, and talking about WHEN the time was right to have our first baby. We were doing pretty much everything TOGETHER!
We were ecstatic when we learned we were pregnant and going to add a new member to our family. For those nine (actually ten) months, we went to doctor’s appointments together, painted and decorated the new nursery together, researched and bought the all important baby equipment together, took a breastfeeding and childbirth class together, and were all ready to have a baby TOGETHER.
Once our beautiful son arrived, we reveled in him TOGETHER! Once we got home, we “attacked” being new parents together, but (funny enough) we were rarely doing the same thing at the same time. We grabbed food when we could, no more sit down dinners together. When one of us was feeding him, the other was doing laundry, the dishes, cleaning, and running to the grocery store. If we were invited to go out for a get-together with friends, one of us went while the other stayed home with our son. When one was up at night feeding, changing, and soothing him, the other was catching the all important zzz’s we needed to care for our newborn the next day.
As I mentioned, we attacked being new parents together, and it was all consuming, as it is with all new parents. We were together, but in a very different way than ever before. I truly thought this lack of husband/wife togetherness would change once our baby got older and didn’t need the vigilance and care that a newborn required. Boy, was I wrong! It became harder and harder to be together emotionally as a couple.
Now with three children under 5 in our family, we have worked very hard at maintaining our couple togetherness. Something that came so easily pre-kids, now takes a lot of hard work to maintain. Don’t get me wrong, I knew becoming parents would alter our lives, but didn’t realize how much work it would take to carve out 10 minutes a day to talk to one another about non-kid topics, or to schedule an hour to get out together (which doesn’t occur nearly as often it should) at $15 or more a pop with a babysitter. I have realized that we aren’t (and probably won’t ever be) the couple we were pre-kids. It came much easier back then, and didn’t require as much thought as it does now. I believe that it is because of our children, that we now respect and relish the time together we spend that is as a couple, and not as parents. We no longer take for granted our conversations about current events and our future hopes and dreams.
Over the last year or two, I determined that whatever the cost: $15 an hour, an extra TV show for the kids to be entertained, or a long drive on a Saturday afternoon with them in their carseats dozing off, it is totally worth it for those precious, rare moments TOGETHER.
If you talk with most new parents, they will share similar sentiments of those I have told you about. Every couple welcoming a new baby has their joys and hardships as a couple. It is important to remember that although a beautiful new baby can change your relationship, you can still maintain that togetherness, differently.
Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest~
Rebecca
We were ecstatic when we learned we were pregnant and going to add a new member to our family. For those nine (actually ten) months, we went to doctor’s appointments together, painted and decorated the new nursery together, researched and bought the all important baby equipment together, took a breastfeeding and childbirth class together, and were all ready to have a baby TOGETHER.
Once our beautiful son arrived, we reveled in him TOGETHER! Once we got home, we “attacked” being new parents together, but (funny enough) we were rarely doing the same thing at the same time. We grabbed food when we could, no more sit down dinners together. When one of us was feeding him, the other was doing laundry, the dishes, cleaning, and running to the grocery store. If we were invited to go out for a get-together with friends, one of us went while the other stayed home with our son. When one was up at night feeding, changing, and soothing him, the other was catching the all important zzz’s we needed to care for our newborn the next day.
As I mentioned, we attacked being new parents together, and it was all consuming, as it is with all new parents. We were together, but in a very different way than ever before. I truly thought this lack of husband/wife togetherness would change once our baby got older and didn’t need the vigilance and care that a newborn required. Boy, was I wrong! It became harder and harder to be together emotionally as a couple.
Now with three children under 5 in our family, we have worked very hard at maintaining our couple togetherness. Something that came so easily pre-kids, now takes a lot of hard work to maintain. Don’t get me wrong, I knew becoming parents would alter our lives, but didn’t realize how much work it would take to carve out 10 minutes a day to talk to one another about non-kid topics, or to schedule an hour to get out together (which doesn’t occur nearly as often it should) at $15 or more a pop with a babysitter. I have realized that we aren’t (and probably won’t ever be) the couple we were pre-kids. It came much easier back then, and didn’t require as much thought as it does now. I believe that it is because of our children, that we now respect and relish the time together we spend that is as a couple, and not as parents. We no longer take for granted our conversations about current events and our future hopes and dreams.
Over the last year or two, I determined that whatever the cost: $15 an hour, an extra TV show for the kids to be entertained, or a long drive on a Saturday afternoon with them in their carseats dozing off, it is totally worth it for those precious, rare moments TOGETHER.
If you talk with most new parents, they will share similar sentiments of those I have told you about. Every couple welcoming a new baby has their joys and hardships as a couple. It is important to remember that although a beautiful new baby can change your relationship, you can still maintain that togetherness, differently.
Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest~
Rebecca
May 13, 2011
GROOVE ~NOT GROVER~ TO THE MUSIC
If your kids are anything like mine, music is a sure fire way to calm down, liven up, or “fix” any situation. The rain has you stuck inside – Who wants to dance to some music?? Stopped in traffic? – Who wants to listen to some music?? Kids are bored – Who wants to have a dance party in the living room?? And so on and so forth.
If you’re anything like me, there are some days where I feel like if I hear one more Elmo or Dora or Grover or Thomas song I think I’m going to scream. Now, no disrespect to the little red furball and his friends. My kids love them therefore, by association, so do I. But Elmo’s la-la-la-la hook and those other silly kids songs are sure to get stuck in your head for weeks on end and there’s simply no escape.
After one particularly rough kiddie-music filled day I made it my mission to hunt down music that my kids would like that I could tolerate being played again and again and again (and again). And what I found was wonderful. Turns out many bands and recording artists I myself enjoy have their own childrens’ albums – who knew! For instance, They Might Be Giants has their record, Here Come the ABCs! Or, a major favorite in my house is now Ziggy Marley’s Family Time. Yes you will be listening to reggae songs written for children, but the tunes are reminiscent of sitting on a beach in Jamaica while the warm sun beats down. And what parent wouldn’t appreciate that music-inspired image? And my ultimate favorite: the Rockabye Baby! CDs. God bless the creator of this series which consists of lullaby renditions of all your favorite recording artists from Green Day to Bon Jovi. You can never imagine just how peaceful Livin On a Prayer is when played by a xylophone.
So, before you lose your marbles do some research to see if your favorite artists have an album that your little ones can enjoy. What you find may surprise you. Move over Barney, there’s a new musician in the house!
Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest-
Liz
If you’re anything like me, there are some days where I feel like if I hear one more Elmo or Dora or Grover or Thomas song I think I’m going to scream. Now, no disrespect to the little red furball and his friends. My kids love them therefore, by association, so do I. But Elmo’s la-la-la-la hook and those other silly kids songs are sure to get stuck in your head for weeks on end and there’s simply no escape.
After one particularly rough kiddie-music filled day I made it my mission to hunt down music that my kids would like that I could tolerate being played again and again and again (and again). And what I found was wonderful. Turns out many bands and recording artists I myself enjoy have their own childrens’ albums – who knew! For instance, They Might Be Giants has their record, Here Come the ABCs! Or, a major favorite in my house is now Ziggy Marley’s Family Time. Yes you will be listening to reggae songs written for children, but the tunes are reminiscent of sitting on a beach in Jamaica while the warm sun beats down. And what parent wouldn’t appreciate that music-inspired image? And my ultimate favorite: the Rockabye Baby! CDs. God bless the creator of this series which consists of lullaby renditions of all your favorite recording artists from Green Day to Bon Jovi. You can never imagine just how peaceful Livin On a Prayer is when played by a xylophone.
So, before you lose your marbles do some research to see if your favorite artists have an album that your little ones can enjoy. What you find may surprise you. Move over Barney, there’s a new musician in the house!
Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest-
Liz
May 10, 2011
TRADITION
As we celebrated Mother’s Day two days ago, it got me thinking about traditions. What we choose to do for ourselves and our families for each and every holiday, whether it’s Christmas, Passover, St. Patrick’s Day or New Years.
Growing up, my wonderful parents had traditions for almost every holiday. These traditions are what I remember most about MY childhood, and the pressure is on to do this for my own children. I awoke on Mother’s Day at 6:00 AM with my three and five year old vigorously trying to wake up my husband while shouting “come on Dad, we have to go make Mom breakfast in bed.” To which my adoring husband responded “in a few minutes, go downstairs and watch TV.” He did get up a few minutes later, and was able to hold off bringing breakfast up to me until a reasonable hour (which meant 8:00 am). My kids were so excited just to WATCH me eat this breakfast in bed that they “made” with Dad.
As I was watching them be so excited for this special occasion, it amazed me that in just three and five years they have grown to look forward to honoring their mom with breakfast in bed on Mother’s Day. It amazed me and also made me realize that what traditions we instill in them at this VERY young age will be life-long.
My parents had some fun, silly and crazy traditions throughout my youth, including pillowcases over my and two siblings’ heads at Christmas (not as weird as it sounds, trust me), family music nights, birthday hats, home-made costumes for Halloween, hand-print turkey drawings at the Thanksgiving table (regardless of age) and so many others. These are the things I remember!
My husband and I have, in my opinion, blended our own nuclear family’s traditions quite well, but it’s the traditions we have started on our own that have been the most fun! Our two older children revel and remember (already at three and five) year to year what we do on a specific holiday, and I am sure our one-year-old won’t be far behind. We have had a great time planning them, and then seeing the payout of our children enjoying them.
Traditions are what can give children that sense of family with wonderful memories. My “mommy friends” and I often discuss our different activities that we do on various holidays with our children and those that we did while growing up. From these discussions, I have implemented (or plan to) those activities in my family. My one friend sent pictures after Valentines Day of leaving Hershey Kisses as a trail to a small gift for her daughters to find when they awoke (one that I am stealing next Valentines Day!!!).
I would love to hear what some of your family traditions are! We would love for you to post your most favorite tradition, activity or memory from this past Mother’s Day! You can log on to our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/StorkSupportLLC and post away! Happy Mother’s Day to all you amazing Moms!!!
Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest~
Rebecca
Growing up, my wonderful parents had traditions for almost every holiday. These traditions are what I remember most about MY childhood, and the pressure is on to do this for my own children. I awoke on Mother’s Day at 6:00 AM with my three and five year old vigorously trying to wake up my husband while shouting “come on Dad, we have to go make Mom breakfast in bed.” To which my adoring husband responded “in a few minutes, go downstairs and watch TV.” He did get up a few minutes later, and was able to hold off bringing breakfast up to me until a reasonable hour (which meant 8:00 am). My kids were so excited just to WATCH me eat this breakfast in bed that they “made” with Dad.
As I was watching them be so excited for this special occasion, it amazed me that in just three and five years they have grown to look forward to honoring their mom with breakfast in bed on Mother’s Day. It amazed me and also made me realize that what traditions we instill in them at this VERY young age will be life-long.
My parents had some fun, silly and crazy traditions throughout my youth, including pillowcases over my and two siblings’ heads at Christmas (not as weird as it sounds, trust me), family music nights, birthday hats, home-made costumes for Halloween, hand-print turkey drawings at the Thanksgiving table (regardless of age) and so many others. These are the things I remember!
My husband and I have, in my opinion, blended our own nuclear family’s traditions quite well, but it’s the traditions we have started on our own that have been the most fun! Our two older children revel and remember (already at three and five) year to year what we do on a specific holiday, and I am sure our one-year-old won’t be far behind. We have had a great time planning them, and then seeing the payout of our children enjoying them.
Traditions are what can give children that sense of family with wonderful memories. My “mommy friends” and I often discuss our different activities that we do on various holidays with our children and those that we did while growing up. From these discussions, I have implemented (or plan to) those activities in my family. My one friend sent pictures after Valentines Day of leaving Hershey Kisses as a trail to a small gift for her daughters to find when they awoke (one that I am stealing next Valentines Day!!!).
I would love to hear what some of your family traditions are! We would love for you to post your most favorite tradition, activity or memory from this past Mother’s Day! You can log on to our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/StorkSupportLLC and post away! Happy Mother’s Day to all you amazing Moms!!!
Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest~
Rebecca
May 6, 2011
DADDY DISAPPOINTMENT
Dear Stork Support,
My wife recently delivered our second baby. Our family just left after visiting for two weeks and I’ve gone back to work. I don’t really know the symptoms but I doubt my wife has postpartum depression. We are both exhausted and fighting a lot. Our friends offer to help, but I’m embarrassed to talk to them about this stuff. I feel like I’m failing.
Signed,
Daddy Disappointment
Dear Daddy,
First, we want to wish you congratulations on the new addition to your family.
Adjusting to a new baby is challenging whether it is your first, second, third or more child. The communication breakdown between partners is not uncommon in times of high stress. It is important to receive the emotional support, counseling and learn about resources to help with the transition to having a new baby, which Stork Support Social Workers are trained to provide. Postpartum Depression is something that all women are at risk for after having their babies.
Our goal is to teach new parents about the symptoms, answer your questions and provide short-term counseling if needed. Stork Support also provides individual or couples counseling which means you and your wife may choose to meet with a Stork Support Social Worker together or individually for support. We encourage you to call us at 610-616-5450. A Stork Support Social Worker will contact you to discuss your concerns and see if Stork Support is right for you.
One more thing, Daddy. We urge you to be careful about using terms like “failing” and “disappointment” when talking about yourself. In our opinion, you are not failing by any means, rather insightful enough to know things are not right and that you need assistance. There is no shame in asking for help.
Wishing you all the best.
Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest~
Liz & Rebecca
May 2, 2011
A WARM SUNNY DAY
This winter seemed so very long, and my kids, my husband and I have had major cabin-fever for these cold five-plus months. I racked my brain all winter for fun things to do, both in the house and on outings, even if just running around the mall for an hour on those really cold days! We made every craft I could think of, got our money’s worth out of our children’s museum membership, attended story hours at the library, and had numerous play dates with friends. It still seemed that there were so many hours in the day to entertain the kids and not enough space for them to expend that pent up toddler energy!
Many times it resulted in the kids fighting, not sharing, and wanting to watch TV or be on the computer for hours on end. It didn't seem to matter how many toys, games, or books I tried to do with them, and it had made me wonder, "what am I doing wrong?"
I have noticed that since the weather has become more spring-like these last few weeks, I have found that my kids have been happier, more compliant and just plain delightful (which makes for a happier, more compliant and delightful mommy too)!
Now that the weather has warmed up we all have been finding new, fun, and energy expending things to do. We are going for daily walks, swinging on the play set, riding bikes, and they are using their incredible imaginations as explorers in the backyard. My oldest son has found a love for gardening and has been digging holes to plant our annual flowers (sometimes even digging when there are no flowers to plant). Now, even when there is a rainy day and we are stuck inside, the old “winter stand-by” activities are once again fun. I realized that what they needed (and what I needed too) was to get out of our four walls, soak in the warm sun, and find new ways to play. It had nothing to do with anything I was doing wrong!
Moms can jump to doubting our abilities, or questioning ourselves way too quickly. Sometimes, no matter what we do to improve the situation, it’s beyond our control. Sometimes we all just need a warm, sunny day!
Sincerely,
From the Stork's Nest~
Rebecca
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