MOM'S NIGHT OUT

Dear Liz and Rebecca,
I’m the mother of two young children.  Whenever I plan time away from my family for “me time,” I feel horribly guilty.  Do you ever feel this way?
Sincerely,
Guilty When Alone

 Dear Guilty,
What you are describing is perfectly normal.  But as Mother’s Day is upon us in just a few short weeks, it is important to remember that taking time for ourselves is healthy to do.  When the guilt creeps up, just remember that motherhood is a challenging full-time job with infrequent breaks.  And while we all love caring for and being with our children, it is key that we pencil in some alone time to replenish our energy and restore our focus.  Whether it’s a manicure appointment, a leisurely walk around the neighborhood or just quiet time in your room to read your favorite magazine, we encourage you to find a babysitter so you can have a well-deserved break.  If you are looking for a fun night out, we love Mom’s Night Out for Mother’s Day on May 4 at the Radnor Hotel: http://mainlineparent.com/2011auction/ - grab your girlfriends and celebrate yourselves because you deserve it, guilt-free!

Sincerely, 

From the Stork’s Nest -

Liz & Rebecca

TOYS, TOYS AND MORE TOYS!!

We were readily prepared for the homecoming of our first baby.  We made room for all the “stuff” we purchased or received for him, and set everything up the way it was supposed to be.  Man, it was A LOT of stuff, and we had lots of rearranging to do.  We were so excited, got rid of our things to make room for our little boy “stuff.”

As our baby grew, and welcomed his little brother and sister, we are now being swallowed up by the toys!  We rarely have a completely toy-free living room floor (even though our basement is a dedicated playroom).    

What blows my mind the most is that with all the toys we have; trucks, cars, electronic games, building blocks, play food, a kitchen, dolls, stuffed animals, some that make noise and some that move on their own, the items they played with the most the other day were a cardboard box and a small pack of dental floss.  Dental floss, you ask.  Yup, dental floss…my daughter held a pack of dental floss (that she was unable to open, of course) for about 4 hours straight the other day, loved the way it sounded when she shook it and screamed when I had to take it away so she could nap safely.

I tried an experiment after said day.  I cleared about 75% of the toys in their playroom and bedrooms to a place where they couldn’t see them.  I’m sure you can guess what happened…nothing!  My children have not missed one toy I have put out of sight, and continue to play with mundane household objects and using their imagination happily!  They seem to delight in showing off what scene they acted out, or what creation they had made with the couch cushions and pillows and seeing our excited, encouraging reaction.

This experiment was one of the most eye-opening for me.  Although I don’t believe I have spoiled my children with toys, they definitely had their fair share.  Children seem to care more about the environment around them and the love surrounding them, rather than a room full of toys, and that is something for which I can make plenty of room.

Sincerely, 

From the Stork's Nest ~

Rebecca

HANDS UP!

I was sitting in the waiting room at the Pediatrician’s office with my six month old daughter for a scheduled check-up a few months ago.  Another mom was sitting with her daughter, our girls looked to be the same age.  After a few seconds of chatting, the other mommy started grilling me with questions and offering unsolicited answers – “Can your daughter wave?  Oh, mine can.  Does your daughter crawl yet?  Mine is super close.  Does your daughter sleep through the night?  Mine sleeps great…”  By the time the nurse called us, I all but jumped out of my seat, scooped up the baby and went running into the examination room. 

But the damage was done, my mind started racing: Was it strange that my daughter wasn’t waving?  Should I be worried that she wasn’t crawling?  Why wasn’t she sleeping through the night?  And then the worse one: Was I doing something wrong as a mother?

Suddenly a lightbulb went off.  I had allowed the mommy in the waiting room to make me feel inadequate with her string of questions and answers.  Then another thought: just when did motherhood become a competition? 

Fast forward to this afternoon.  While stopped at a traffic light, I started grooving out to Elmo’s Theme Song playing on the radio as my kids danced in their car seats.  As I was flailing my arms wildly, I realized the women stopped in a mini van in the lane next to us was watching me.  I froze in embarrassment only to see her throw her fist in the air at me a la “power to the people!”  I waved and she honked, then the light changed and we drove along. 

We can all agree that motherhood is comprised of one challenge after another.  It’s time we all start grooving to the music and throwing our hands up in support of each other rather than making everything a competition.  After all, aren’t we all running the same race, hoping to be winners in our kids’ eyes in the end? 

So, from one mom to another, my hands are up to you all.   

Sincerely,

From the Stork’s Nest-

Liz

THANKS FOR THAT AWESOME ADVICE!

“Congratulations on your baby!”  “Don’t use a pacifier; don’t hold him too much or you’ll spoil him; just let him cry it out; don’t let him cry it out; he looks really hungry; make sure you sleep when he sleeps; only put soft soled shoes on your baby; only put hard soled shoes on your baby; don’t put any shoes on your baby.”

“Wow…what great advice,” I say, and I think, “now what do I do?”

So what do we do when we get all this unwanted or unsolicited advice from our parents, sisters, brothers, aunts, in-laws, friends and even strangers?  We may nod our heads and say “thank you,” we may snap back at them, we may do what they suggest, all the while wondering if we are REALLY doing what is best for our baby.

Granted, it is great to receive tips from those who have been there, but that doesn’t mean that we need to implement those suggestions in our lives.  Every baby is different, as is every family; so what works for one family does not mean it will necessarily work for another.  We need to remember that new parents still have functioning brains (although I question the functionality of my own brain at times), and usually know their baby’s personalities and needs better than those offering bits of great advice. 

For all you new parents out there, remember to trust your instincts, and do what feels right.   Wait… did I just give you some unsolicited advice?

Sincerely,

From the Stork’s Nest -

Rebecca

MOTHER STORK

I’ve always wondered where the legend about storks bringing babies came from.  Just how did the stork get its rep as mankind’s “mother” delivering babies to parents-in-waiting?  A good ole google search revealed the answer.  Apparently the European white stork often nests on roofs and chimneys in the spring, a time when many babies are born.  Could that be it?  So anticlimactic!

But then I read more about the stately stork. 

At about four weeks after birth, stork chicks start to stand up in the nest and flap their wings.  After just a few months, storks’ flight feathers grow in and they learn to fly.  Speaking of which, storks are beautiful in flight.  Just like our Stork Support logo, they fly by soaring on warm air currents with long, strong wings.  With their necks stretched out and legs dangling behind them, storks in flight are recognizable even from far away.  Breathtaking!

As I read, a light bulb went on as to the link between the stork and motherhood.  Like baby storks, it takes us a few weeks to recover from our delivery to stand up, flap our wings and become more comfortable in our new role.  Just like the stork, within a few months we “take flight” – we are usually up and running, multitasking to take care of ourselves and our family.  Just as storks in flight are breathtaking, so are mothers “in flight.”  Have you ever taken a moment to watch yourself as you go about your day?  Waking early after not much sleep, caring for baby, caring for siblings, caring for house and partner, maybe going to work and more.  We’re often hard on ourselves, but the reality is we exhibit strength on a daily basis.  And that is pretty breathtaking to me.

Sincerely,

From the Stork’s Nest ~

Liz

THE BEST LAID PLANS...

Many of us plan EVERYTHING!  We plan our vacations, a Saturday night dinner out, when to go grocery shopping…everything!  This planning is never more evident than during the forty glorious weeks of pregnancy (well, maybe not glorious).  The big question is, how do we feel when events don’t go as planned?

My first child made his entrance into this grand world five weeks early, completely unexpected (as most preemies are) and with sheer panic on my part.  The last few weeks of pregnancy can be brutal, so it was with mixed emotions that I learned we would be meeting our baby earlier than expected.  A major plus was that I wouldn’t have to be pregnant anymore (YAY for me) and would soon learn if this little one was a boy or a girl.  On the other hand, I had great worries about my baby being healthy, having those mature lungs and being okay “on the outside.” 

After hours and hours of trying to get my body into labor, nothing was working.  I was in pain and unable to receive that epidural I had ordered as soon as I peed on the stick.  It was then decided by the powers- that-be that a C-section would be necessary.  I would have to be under general anesthesia, my husband could not be in the operating room and I wouldn’t be able to hear my baby’s first cry.  This was NOT the plan! 

All my visions of my labor and delivery were completely different than what actually happened, from rushing to the hospital contracting, to being awake when my baby was born.  I worried that others would know the sex of my little bundle before me, because I would be asleep.  Nothing was going as I had planned and hoped. 

Of course I went with it, because ultimately I wanted what was best for me and my baby.  I was put “under” and had the C-Section while my husband was standing outside the operating room doors.  He was able to see the doctor deliver our baby and no family was told the sex (A BOY!) until I awoke and learned it myself.  The BEST part was I had a healthy baby.

Well, in the five and a half years that I have been a parent (adding two more to the family) I have decided, with the above being the first clue, that the old adage by Robert Burns “the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry” should be a mantra in every mothers’ life.  No matter how well we plan something, always expect the unexpected.    
Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest ~
Rebecca

TO SHOP OR NOT TO SHOP? THAT IS THE QUESTION!

Dear Liz & Rebecca,
I’m a new mom wondering about consignment sales.  My friends talk about them but I’m not sure how I feel about buying used clothing and items.  What do you think?
Signed,
Cautious about Consignments 
 

Dear Cautious,
We feel that consignment sales are an outstanding way to find excellent buys on everything you’ll need for baby.  They’re a great place to pick up items that are generally expensive but will only get worn one or two seasons like special occasion outfits, jackets, pajamas and shoes.  Sales that are well run only accept clothing in good shape or toys in working order (usually with batteries!) so you can rest assure that taking time out of your busy schedule to go to the sale is worth the trip.  Consignment sales are also a great place to find extra items to leave at grandma’s or the babysitter’s house.   

The good news is that you’re inquiring at the perfect time – as spring unfolds, so do consignment sales around the area.  We especially love the Second Time Around Sale at Broomall Presbyterian Church from April 8 and 9.  Check out their website at http://secondtimearoundkidssale.weebly.com/.

Happy Shopping!    

Sincerely,
From the Stork’s Nest
Liz & Rebecca

Congratulations! It's a .... Stork!

INTRODUCING STORK SUPPORT, LLC

We are tickled pink to announce the birth of our baby, Stork Support.  After several months (almost nine, ironically) of preparation and planning, we are thrilled to introduce Stork Support to you all.  Stork Support is a unique service that offers emotional support, counseling and resources to mothers on bed rest and new parents in the comfort of their own homes provided by experienced, Masters-prepared Social Workers. 

After years of working with new parents, we hoped and wished for parents to have support that comes to them when needed.  After all, parents of newborn infants are generally sleep deprived, shower deprived and all-round energy deprived.  The last thing new parents want to do is leave their home with baby in tow or have to arrange childcare.  As parents to young children ourselves, we remember this well.  We also know how wonderful yet overwhelming it can be caring for a newborn.  Stork Support was born with this idea in mind – we have created Stork Support to be the service that we ourselves would have wanted after our own children were born.

So, take a look at our website.  Call us at 610-616-5450.  Share the information with your friends and family.  Review our session options and let us know if Stork Support can assist you and your family. 

With Stork Support parents are not alone.  We can help and we are just a phone call away.  We look forward to being a part of your lives and you being a part of ours!

Sincerely,

From the Stork’s Nest ~

Liz & Rebecca